Allies
In this time of discord, disconnection and strife, I find myself seeking solid ground to stand on.
I admit, 2020 was a year of Doomscrolling for me.
Waking up each morning, reaching for my device to find out what terrible thing happened as I slept. A disorienting way to begin my day, this method of using the eyes and agendas of others to define my world.
Many of these definitions tending toward hard line, black and white perspective.
This is Wrong!
That is Right!
This person Bad!
That person Good!
I am searching for how to stand powerfully for myself and my community.
My declaration for the power of community. Is it good? Is it bad?
Is it Right? or is it wrong?
Right, adjective:
1. Righteous Upright,
2. Being in accordance with what is just, good or proper.
3. Suitable, Appropriate
Yet here is the thing I have stumbled across,
If I want to do the right thing, which is it…
1. the right thing for me?
2. The right thing for you?
Or
3. the right thing for us?
Uh oh, here we go….
My opinion of what is right and wrong is derived from myriad sources.
Opinion, noun; a view, judgment or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter.
My parents, my social group, my education, the media, social media out of all that, I have I absorbed things out of which I build my truth
Truth, noun.
1. The body of real things, events and facts.
2. (Truth with a capitol T) a transcendent fundamental or spiritual reality.
In short, my opinion is created out of information I have gathered from multiple sources and I have chosen to hold as my Truths.
These all combine to create the foundation of who I am.
And being human, these fundamental Truths
(yes, still, Truths with a capitol T) allow me to function in my life.
It is human and necessary to have truths to define our reality.
It is out of these truths I have to parse out what I hold to be right.
Yet, I spend little time looking at who it is right for, me, you, or us.
Bias, noun; the tendency, inclination or prejudice toward or against something or someone.
Bias, is very human, and we all have it. It is neither good nor bad, it is something fundamental we each have.
My opinion is that we must begin to train ourselves to have dialogue.
Dialogue, verb; to take part in a conversation or discussion to resolve a problem.
In order to participate in a dialogue, I must listen
Listen, verb, to pay attention to something or someone in order to hear what is being said, sung or played.
If I let go of my need for agreement, sometimes an impressively difficult task, that opens me up to engage with another human in the exchange of ideas.
The problems we face as individuals, a society and a species can only be solved through dialogue. It is unlikely there is only one right answer, whatever the answer is we will only discover it through dialogue.
What if I do not agree with you? then, perhaps I can seek out a way for us to be allies.
Ally, noun, one that is associated with another, as a helper; a person or group that provides assistance and support in an ongoing effort, activity or struggle
Seeking allies, does not require that we agree on everything. It leaves lots of room for individual needs and wants. We can look for common goals that will make a difference for all of us.
If I listen to you, and you listen to me, then we can proceed to discover what is good for us.
So then, perhaps, what is right, is a combination of what is right for me, what is right for you and what is right for us.