Anxiety and Discomfort

A friend told me recently that she has figured out she is neurodivergent.

 Neurodivergent, bah!

 Diverge, v, 1. separate from another route, especially a main one.

      2. (mathematics) increase indefinitely as more of its terms are added.

 I do like #2 more.

What if, by giving ourselves permission to be ourselves, our lives will increase indefinitely?

#1 hints at something less mainstream, secondary if you will,

FUK! That!

Thank the universe I do not have a muggle brain.

One that finds comfort in the “normal”.

The expected and predictable.

Nah, not for me.

 What if, when we turn off the main route is when the adventure begins?

Adventure, v. it was suggested to me years ago,

A true adventure is an experience where you either die, or you have a good story to tell.

 Oh yes, the discomfort of the unknown,

we do find ourselves whining about that.

Using words like, anxious, scared, terrified, uncomfortable etc.

These words, and others of their ilk, describe our feelings and the physical manifestations of our discomfort with the unknown.

Butterflies, sweaty palms, a slight headache, blushing, difficulty breathing.

 My question is, what if those words actually describe what it feels like, to have fun as an adult?

Adult, n, a person who is fully grown and developed.

 In other words, anxious, scared, uncomfortable are all feelings we identified as children (tiny, not fully grown or developed humans) as signs or danger.

Truly an age-appropriate response for a young human.

Yet here we are, fully grown adults, and we still subject ourselves to our child’s response to various situations.

Another thing, as fully grown humans, those feeling and words show up with some degree of frequency,

hmm, it is almost as is we seek them out and then complain about how we do not like them.

 We are such silly monkeys.

 What if we owned the fact that, we, and everyone else on the face of this magnificent planet, have no idea what we are doing? We each make it all up every day.

 Damned right it is uncomfortable. So what?

 Discomfort, n, slight pain, to feel uneasy.

 If we pause and reflect on our lives to date, we will notice we have done alright for ourselves.

Oh, I know, we don’t have enough money, love, Legos etc. And yet, we have done alright.

Shall we look at the evidence?

Here you are.

Yes, I understand we have each made some “BAD choices” or, to put it another way, we all have made choices we do not like the consequences of, and yet, here we are, doing ok.

Perhaps the trick is to notice we are trustworthy. We can trust ourselves.

No, not to make “good” choices, but, more importantly, to work things out the best we can.

 A human life, what a wacky thing.

We are born, incapable of doing anything, over time we learn some skills.

Starting with figuring out how to breathe right after we are born, noticing if I spread my lips and crinkle my eyes, the big human holding me will do that back at me, coo and hug me tighter.

Learning to eat, to walk, to drink out of a cup, touching hot things will hurt, kicking a ball, how to write and so on.

We continue to deeply explore how to interact with humans,

Later on, a first kiss, hormones, sex, heartbreak and on and on.

Then after 18 years of stumbling through it all the best we can,

society says, OK, now you are an adult, you are on your own.

Remember, make good choices, they say lovingly.

Really? WTF do I do now?

And still, every day we wake up, get out of bed and we make it up, the best we can.

And that will never change.

Yes, perhaps, if you are paying attention, you will learn some things before you die.

Which, by the way, you will do some day. But that is another conversation.

Each of us could, not should, but could make every moment of the rest of our lives count.

Take on the practice of having each moment be a unique experience.

Practice being present to what is going on right now.

Practice ignoring our opinion about how it should be and instead be present to what it is.

To trust ourselves. Give ourselves permission to be who we are.

We each could do that.

I have seen a bumper sticker that says,

Everything will be OK.

What I am suggesting is,

Everything is OK